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Thursday, 15 January 2009

What am I up to right now? I don't even know. :))

Things have been really crazy nowadays!

Our periodical exams came to past now that's why I feel so happy :D. But just the thought of it makes me a bit sad because I am about to graduate already. I'll be missing a lot of persons for sure. Then, after approximately 6 weeks, it'll be our finals. Gosh! I can't believe how time flies soooo fast. I just greatly noticed it now.

So what exactly am I up to right now?

Actually, I don't know. Hahaha!

I have been emotionally unstable nowadays. There are a lot of things running through my head. I want to make sure if what I'm feeling is right. I do go through a lot of mood swings now. Unfortunately, I have no one to confide with. And no, there are no trust issues with anyone. Actually, I find it easy to trust people. I think it's more of internal issues.

I ain't confident of myself now. Currently, I believe that no one's really interested in me. Not romantically. I don't really care too much about that stuff. What I mean is, I feel that no one would ever bother asking or thinking about a person as boring as me. And the worst? The person whom I consider my best friend in the room I belong in is, I think, slowly drawing away from me. Maybe I have my own faults, too. But what I need most right now is his support... And I am not getting it... and so I think. I share flaws about this issue. Perhaps, it's my fault mainly. It started the week after sembreak. I started not talking to him. He said something really hurtful to me beforehand... and I did not bother telling him what exactly was wrong. Now, I am suffering the consequences. If I told him, I think that move should have prevented this matter of going this far.

...I hope I get over this phase

'Cause I’m stuck inside this haze

All I need is a simple lift

Such a sweet and precious gift

So I don’t lose it all before

What I have left is nothing more...

Although I feel such emotional struggles, there are still blessings that come my way. Passing some of the college entrance exams was indeed a great blessing for me. Also, while I was reviewing for the exams, I had really 'strong resistance'. Haha! That made me review rigidly xD.

Sorry for this blog post's randomness. I just have to blurt out what I am feeling in the most comfortable way I can think of. :p